T’was the night before a SaH Christmas 2025

’Twas the night before Christmas and all round Australia,

Folks were praying the scheme would not be a failure.

The Act is in place, the stage should be set,

But Anika took off in a taxpayer jet.

Who’s in charge now? It’s not really known;

The lights are all on, but there’s no one at home.

They changed all the rules, but not fixed their game

Practice and policy aren’t playing the same.

Assessments were meant to be simple and fair,

But they dropped in a system that just doesn’t care.

“A single front door,” the slogans did show,

Instead we got the computer says “NO”.

While their tech spending could rebuild the Great Wall,

The funding for providers? Well, that’s close to stuff-all.

And older Australians are starting to fret,

They’re paying in more and it’s ending in debt.

Then government did what governments do:

They twisted “no worse off” till it barely rang true.

“Did you not know what we meant when we said what we said?

You’re not one of the sharpest tools in the shed.”

“No worse off” is a principle dear to our hearts,

We’ll explain it again for you slow-moving carts.

But maybe tomorrow… today’s got away,

We’re busy finding new ways to make old people pay.

Those cashed up boomers with savings and wealth,

With shares and a house and suspicious good health.

The partners can pay too, the husbands and wives,

We’ll teach them for saving for all of their lives.

And if reading this poem makes you feel a bit tense,

We’re sorry this system just doesn’t make sense.

We’re just having fun, some rhymes, maybe riddles,

While remembering life's not all beer and skittles.

So here’s to the workers who keep getting it done,

To managers and admin who make it all run.

May your clients stay calm, may your invoices clear,

And may it get a bit simple… well, maybe next year.

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